I get this statement, made by a cross-section of professionals, all the time: “I couldn’t do what you do.” Then I think, I couldn’t do what you do, either.
To be perfectly honest, I fell into this EMS (Emergency Medical Services) career, so I think it chose me.
I’ve been on some tough calls as an EMS (and some humorous ones). I’ve seen people who were not at their “best” when I arrived at the scene. I have had to put myself into a “box” of professionalism to do what needed to be done. This was as much for my own mental survival, after difficult calls, as it was for the patient.
In my early years, this was harder as I didn’t have the coping skills yet. Not to say I have mastered this, today, but I have been better able to assess/sort/deflect/absorb the information needed to perform my duties, “survive the call” and not be affected for the next call.
Today I’m robotic, emotionally and clinically (and I speak only for myself), when I am on a difficult call. This is my “personal suitability” that has enabled me to be effective on difficult calls … because there will always be another call.
I have relied not only on my training, but also; in fact mostly, on this “personal suitability”.  There isn’t a book or course to prepare you for the spectrum of calls an EMS attends.
It’s also difficult to train new paramedics in what to expect mentally after a difficult call. It’s hard not to “infect” them with my bad experiences when I think telling them might help.
The sad thing is that I, as a partner or supervisor, have to wait for them to experience this for themselves. Then I offer my assistance afterwards.
In my years of experience (24 in EMS), I still have triggers from past calls. Some triggers could be as simple as the colour of a patient’s hair (because you were doing airway management or putting a cervical collar on them). Or it could be as complex as a smell.
On my first call, I tended to a burn victim. Firefighters brought him out of the house and placed him on the ground in front of me and my partner.
He was severely burned from his lower abdomen down, and not breathing. Despite our efforts on the scene and then being transported to the hospital, he did not survive. This left me with a trigger: it was some time before I could barbecue anything.
I thought afterwards that I would look for a new job.
This is what is known as Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. It affects the police and firefighters, as well. I have had counselling, which is offered through my workplace to help with these experiences.
So I consider that statement, “I couldn’t do what you do”, to be a compliment.